Step 2: After you exhaust your own knowledge of your family, it is time to get your family involved. Talk to or even interview your parents (if they are alive) and your other relatives, especially your oldest living relatives. They probably assume that you know things that you do not.

Go to them with a grateful heart and most will be more than happy to share what they know about the family. Be gracious if they are not receptive. Sometimes emotions might be stirred of loved ones lost or even of old family scandals. Let them know you appreciate them regardless of if they share family history with you. If they are not ready to share initially, they might surprise you later.

Before you interview them, review what you already know and prepare questions about things you would like to know about and gaps in what you already know. Ask specific questions, starting from what you know. If you say, “Tell me our family’s history,” they probably will not know what to say or where to start. But if you ask, “When was grandpa born? Where? Who were his parents?” you will make it easier for them to share with you. You might let them know what you have learned so they can fill in the blanks and confirm or correct information that you already have.

Talking to your family members will take you back in time far more quickly than you could ever do on your own or through database research alone.